Sex, Love and Relationships with Anna-Megan Raley

When I was little and tried to build my own bicylce jump ramp with a small piece of plywood, a piece of a 2×4 and an old tire, I thought I was a genius. When I landed in a potthole and had blood trickling down my leg, I ran as fast as I could to Mom. It was her job to comfort me.

As adults, our time is no longer invested in just schoolwork, the few neighborhood friends, playing Little League softball games and pleasing our parents. We develop rapports with work associates, participate in hobbies that don’t require Mom and Dad’s supervision and try to get through adult situations with as little stress as possible. We find new circles of friends and get into romantic relationships.

The problems we face as adults usually can’t be solved with a bandaid, baby talk and a hug from Mom. Not that I condone those kind of relationships of which one partner is more like a parent, but your significant other does become that one person that you run to when the bike ramps of your world break and the hurt is overwhelming.

Your honey becomes your go-to confidant when you’re mad about at that rude woman in your office, when private family issues are crushing you or when you really need help getting your taxes together. You think this person is the love of your life so it’s easy to share the most intimate details of your world, the things that hurt or haunt you or even the silly things that nobody else knows about you.

During the aftermath of a breakup, though, you are not only coping with the reality of entering the single world again, but you’re facing this not-so-familiar way of life without that one person who’s had your back for however long the two of you dated.

I’m sure everybody handles breakups their own way – hopefully, you have friends and family to pull you through the tough moments. But remember there will be times when your day will be so trying that you’ll want that one person back around to turn that frown upside-down, but it’s no longer your ex’s job to cheer you up. You’ll have to look elsewhere.

To me, the hardest part of a breakup is when it’s all said and done – when you wish you could turn around and know that your one-time partner was standing there to support you through the good and the bad. At that point, remember all the bad and find the strength within yourself. Or you can run back like a sap.

— SLR w/ AMR

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