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TALE OF THE TAPE

Houston Texans Vs. FNL’s Dillon Panthers

The Houston Texans are 5-0, trying to ride the metaphorical undefeated bull as long as they can and become Texas’s favorite team. But Texas and football are a match made in heaven for high schools, universities, and dramatic screenwriters alike. There’s no winning over Texas without first winning over the kings of Friday night, Coach Eric Taylor’s Dillon High School Panthers fromFriday Night Lights. Move the chains!

NOTE: Spoiler alerts if you’ve never seen season one of Friday Night Lights.

Texans
Dillon Panthers
Tennessee Titans v Houston Texans
2008 Summer TCA Tour - Day 13
Record Through Week 5
Winner 5-0
4-1
Quarterback
Winner Matt Schaub: During his senior year at West Chester East High School in West Chester, Pennsylvania, he led the school's football team to win the Ches-Mont League championship.
Matt Seracen: After taking the place of the injured QB1, Seracen drove his Panthers all the way to the Texas State Championship.
Coach Quotes
"It's about the team. And like we said last night, like we said today...Yes we can!"
Winner "Every man at some point in his life is going to lose a battle. He is going to fight, and he is going to lose. But what makes him a man is at the midst of that battle, he does not lose himself. This game is not over, this battle is not over."
Biggest Player Loss of the Season
Brian Cushing, ACL tear. Bright side? Announcers get to sound classy announcing "Mister Alexander."
Winner Jason Street, Spinal injury. Thanks to hindsight, we know that the Panthers kept their heads up after this serious loss. And then literally, keep their heads up.
Team Chant
Houston....Texans.
Winner "Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose!"
Cheerleaders
Winner There are two sets of twins, Dresdynn & Schuyler and Michelle & Rachel.
Two words: Lyla Garrity.
Field Sponsor
Winner Reliant - "The Electric Company You Can Rely On"
Buddy Garrity Motors - "I'm Your Buddy!"
Team Mascot
Winner Toro
Panther
Running Back
Winner Fantasy and real football rockstar, Arian Foster. Not only is he a powerhouse on the field, he's writes poetry, raps, keeps a vegan diet, volunteers with the Boys and Girls Club of Houston and gives back to his home town of Albuquerque, New Mexico!
Mr. Dillon High School himself, the Ray Rice of Dillon, Texas, Mr. Brian "Smash" Williams. His quick feet and small stature take him to the top, eventually to college, but not without a few steroids along the way.
Roots
Houston Oilers (currently the Tennesee Titans)
Winner Friday Night Lights (The movie)

The Winner Is

Tennessee Titans v Houston Texans
Winner Texans
6 out of 10

Houston Texans. Since 2002 when the Oilers left Houston for Tennessee, the Texans have spent the last 10 years earning their spot in the NFL and proving that they can win just like the best of 'em. Maybe Coach Gary Kubiak doesn't have the most poetic tongue or the family manskills of a perfected fictional father, but this is football and when you're undefeated you're a winner. Texas forever.

MORE TALES OF THE TAPE

  1. DENVER, CO - OCTOBER 27: Quarterback Peyton Manning #18 of the Denver Broncos runs out onto the field as flames ignite during player introductions before a game against the Washington Redskins at Sports Authority Field Field at Mile High on October 27, 2013 in Denver, Colorado. This picture taken on April 26, 2014 shows Japanese videogame giant Nintendo's characters Super Mario and Luigi (L) performing in Chiba, suburban Tokyo. Nintendo booked a 229 million USD annual loss on May 7, reversing a year-earlier profit as dismal sales of its Wii U console during the crucial Christmas holiday period dented results.
    NFL Players Vs. Nintendo Characters, Who Has The More Ridiculous Talents?

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  2. Oakland Raiders v New England Patriots (Photo by Joel Auerbach/Getty Images)
    Tale Of The Tape: New England Patriots At Kansas City Chiefs

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  3. Minnesota Vikings v New Orleans Saints Dallas Cowboys v St. Louis Rams
    Tale Of The Tape: New Orleans Saints At Dallas Cowboys

    The Saints finally got their first win of the season against the Minnesota Vikings, as Drew Brees directed the New Orleans offense to a couple of early touchdowns and that was enough to earn Sean Payton’s team a victory.

See All Tales of the Tape
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