The Houston Astros Are Major League Baseball’s New Superheroes

The Houston Astros made a big move on Thursday signing free agent Josh Reddick to star in their outfield. Reddick is known to wear a full Spiderman suit under his uniform for every game.

This may sound weird, but it is completely justified.

And this.

It’s a suitable thing for him.

The Astros already have a superhero on the team in pitcher Lance McCullers who wore batman cleats in his Major League debut in 2015.

Young, attractive, following in his father’s footsteps, if that isn’t Bruce Wayne we don’t know what is.

With that in mind, we thought we’d cast the rest of the Astros roster as Superheroes. If nothing else it will give them Halloween Costumes to wear as they fly to Chicago for game 6 of the World Series next year.

Batman: Lance McCullers

HOUSTON, TX - MAY 18: Lance McCullers #43 of the Houston Astros throws in his Under Armour "Batman" shoes against the Oakland Athletics at Minute Maid Park on May 18, 2015 in Houston, Texas. (Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)

HOUSTON, TX – MAY 18: Lance McCullers #43 of the Houston Astros throws in his Under Armour “Batman” shoes. (Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)

We already addressed this.

Spider-Man: Josh Reddick

LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 22: Josh Reddick #11 of the Los Angeles Dodgers poses for a for with comic book writer Stan Lee before the game against the Colorado Rockies at Dodger Stadium on September 22, 2016 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Harry How/Getty Images)

LOS ANGELES, CA – SEPTEMBER 22: Josh Reddick #11 of the Los Angeles Dodgers poses for a for with comic book writer Stan Lee  (Photo by Harry How/Getty Images)

Yup.

Ant-Man: Jose Altuve

(Photo by Richard Bord/Getty Images) & (Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images)

(Photo by Richard Bord/Getty Images) & (Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images)

He’s little most of the time and packs more punch than you would expect someone of his stature to produce such power.  He also can become Giant-Mn when the moment calls for it.

The Hulk: Evan Gattis

OAKLAND, CA - SEPTEMBER 20: Evan Gattis #11 of the Houston Astros at bat against the Oakland Athletics during the ninth inning at the Oakland Coliseum on September 20, 2016 in Oakland, California. The Houston Astros defeated the Oakland Athletics 2-1 in 10 innings. (Photo by Jason O. Watson/Getty Images)

(Photo by Jason O. Watson/Getty Images)

Big and powerful and someone you don’t want to make angry. Very few people can handle hitting Major League fastballs without batting gloves.  Of course, it’s easy when you are filled with gamma radiation.

Iron Man: Alex Bregman

(Photo by Hannah Foslien/Getty Images) & (Photo by Jun Sato/ WireImage)

(Photo by Hannah Foslien/Getty Images) & (Photo by Jun Sato/ WireImage)

Has all the tools, can do everything and anything you need him to.  Also pretty popular with the ladies.  Has some swagger.  No confirmation that he can actually fly or has an Arc-Reactor keeping his heart safe from shrapnel.

Captain America: George Springer

(Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images) & (Photo by Chad Buchanan/GC Images)

(Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images) & (Photo by Chad Buchanan/GC Images)

He might not be the best superhero/player of the group but he absolutely holds this team together and others follow in his footsteps.  Also an American boy from New Britain, CT you can always trust on Springer.

The Flash: Tony Kemp

(Photo by Hannah Foslien/Getty Images) & (Photo by Warner Brothers/Getty Images)

(Photo by Hannah Foslien/Getty Images) & (Photo by Warner Brothers/Getty Images)

He’s really fast.

Hawkeye: Dallas Kuechel

(Disney XD via Getty Images) & (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)

(Disney XD via Getty Images) & (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)

There isn’t something necessarily super about Hawkeye (much like Green Arrow) but the accuracy in which they fire their shots is other-worldly.  Just like Keuchel.

Wolverine: Carlos Correa

 (Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images for Madame Tussauds) & (Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)

(Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images for Madame Tussauds) & (Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)

How does someone break their leg like Correa did in the minor leagues and come back better and stronger? It’s obviously his rejuvenation powers. Now that he’s covered in adamantium, we should have no problem with injuries. Also, he’s obviously everyone’s favorite.

Thor: Brian McCann

NEW YORK, NY - JUNE 6: Brian McCann #34 of the New York Yankees hits a 2-run home run against the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim during the first inning at Yankee Stadium on June 6, 2015 in the Bronx borough of New York City. (Photo by Adam Hunger/Getty Images)

(Photo by Adam Hunger/Getty Images)

We don’t know much about Brian McCann, who the Astros traded for on Thursday. We just know he has crossed the Bifrost bridge into our world to make it a better place and use his powerful hammer Mjolnir to swat home runs. (If McCann doesn’t name his bat Mjolnir now, we’re going to be greatly disappointed.)

Human Torch: Ken Giles

HOUSTON, TX - AUGUST 01: Ken Giles #53 of the Houston Astros reacts after striking out Michael Saunders #21 of the Toronto Blue Jays in the eighth inning at Minute Maid Park on August 1, 2016 in Houston, Texas. (Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)

(Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)

Sometimes he is just spitting fireballs past hitters and other times he just completely bursts into flames.  It’s a wild ride, but it is fun and can be really rewarding.

Aquaman: Jake Mariznick

HOUSTON, TX - OCTOBER 12: Colby Rasmus #28 of the Houston Astros celebrates his seventh inning solo home run as Jake Marisnick #6 throws water on him against the Kansas City Royals during game four of the American League Divison Series at Minute Maid Park on October 12, 2015 in Houston, Texas. (Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)

(Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)

When an Astros player hits a home run they are splashed with a cup of water for their efforts by the man in charge of the water, Jake Mariznick.  Also for some reason, some people just hate him.

Cyclopse: A.J. Hinch

KANSAS CITY, MO - OCTOBER 08: Manager A.J. Hinch #14 of the Houston Astros looks on prior to game one of the American League Division Series between the Kansas City Royals and the Houston Astros at Kauffman Stadium on October 8, 2015 in Kansas City, Missouri. (Photo by Ed Zurga/Getty Images)

(Photo by Ed Zurga/Getty Images)

The leader of the X-Men the man who takes the tools given to him by Professor X and makes them work together for the good of Houston.  Also, don’t get caught in his stare if you do something wrong.

Professor X: Jeff Luhnow

HOUSTON, TX - JUNE 02: Houston Astros general manager Jeff Luhnow waits on the field prior to the start of their game against the Baltimore Orioles at Minute Maid Park on June 2, 2015 in Houston, Texas. (Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images)

(Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images)

The man who brings all the pieces together to form the ultimate team.  Scouring the globe for the best, with the best tools to properly complement each other, this man is the brains behind it all.

 

Who did we miss? Who did we get wrong? Let us know:

 

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